Cremation Service
19 November 2007
Alexandra Davies
1 February 1947 –
1.
Entrance Music - Mozart, Clarinet Concerto
2. Welcome
We are gathering here for the ritual of committing
Alexandra’s body back to the elements.
To celebrate her life and to mourn her death - we will
share this time of reflection which will help us affirm the ongoing link we all
have with her - webs of memory and feeling. This link continues on, even while
her life in the body is over – as her love and understanding carries on its
work in our lives. Somehow she will continue to keep us in good order – as
always…
I believe that right now - Alexandra would want to
help us work through our loss. She would insist that we should feel free to
experience whatever comes up – tears and smiles and gratitude and silence –.
All feelings and thoughts are welcome to her - as we were always welcome to
Alexandra with all our rough and smooth edges…
Pause
3.
I will now read from T.S.Elliot’s
“Little Gidding” V - to honour Alexandra’s love of
language and beauty, and her perennial power of comforting!
What we call the beginning is often the end
And to make an end is to make a beginning…
[[[The end is where we start from. And every phrase
And sentence that is right (every word is at home,
Taking its place to support the others,
The word neither diffident nor ostentatious,
An easy commerce of the old and the new,
The common word exact without vulgarity,
The formal word precise but not pedantic,
The complete consort dancing together)]]]…
…Every phrase and every sentence is an end and a
beginning,
Every poem an epitaph. And any action
Is a step to the block, to the fire, down the sea’s
throat
Or to an illegible stone: and that is where we start.
We die with the dying:
See, they depart and we go with them.
We are born with the dead:
See, they return, and bring us with them.
The moment of the rose and the yew-tree
Are of equal duration. [[[A people without history
Is not redeemed from time, for history is a pattern
Of timeless moments. So, while the light fails
On a winter’s afternoon, in a secluded chapel
History is now and England.]]
With the drawing of this Love and the voice of this
Calling
We shall not cease from exploration
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we have started
And know the place for the first time.
Through the unknown, remembered gate
When the last of earth left to discover
Is that which was at the beginning;
At the source of the longest river
The voice of the hidden waterfall
And the children in the apple-tree
Not known, because not looked for
But heard, half-heard, in the stillness
Between two waves of the sea.
Quick now, here, now, always –
A condition of complete simplicity
(Costing not less than everything)
And all shall be well and
All manner of thing shall be well
When the tongues of flame are in-folded
Into the crowned knot of fire
And the fire and the rose are one.
4. Silent Reflection
5. A few thoughts for this
moment
This finally is the moment, when we have to let
Alexandra’s body go.
And as we let go of her physical body - I am sure we
all feel her still - hugging us, drawing us in whenever there was need,
whenever it felt right… and then some more…
Alexandra knew how to use her body for pleasure and
love and comfort in many different ways – so I think this a good time to say a
very special thank you to this body which carried her being so well…. And then,
through these last months, it became a burden to her, preparing her and us for this last good bye.
Alexandra knew
when it was right for her to let go – with her innate sense of clarity and
purpose… So she went gently in the end and with grace, probably deciding that this moment “would do!”
Always she was willing to use her body – literally! -
to be in touch, to love and to soothe – whatever our needs were.
And while this last period was one of great suffering,
it was also a time of extraordinary joy and intensity – embodied by Alexandra
sitting in her chair with Abigail on her lap, reading – and everybody else
draped around her…John looking after her in his inimitable way…
So I say ‘thank you’ to her embodied self - as she has
been with us in her marvellously touching ways…
You may now want to come up to Alexandra - and
6. lay a rose by her …while Emma Kirkby sings
Mozart’s Laudate dominum
– Silent progression
7. Committal after the roses have
been laid down…
“This now is the moment when Alexandra’s body goes – so she can take up full residence in our
hearts and our memory….
Curtain closes… short silence
8. Words for Closure
Let us go out together from this place with as much
peace as we can muster – knowing that Alexandra’s strength and love and clarity
will remain with us always…
9. Music for leaving